So, I’m walking to work from the bus this morning when it happens again. A bearded man with a green tie-dye bandana approaches me. Now, my mp3 player is broken, but lately I have been wearing the headphones and just faking it, but today I forgot.
Bandana: Hey, another fellow environmentalist?
Bandana: No? Don’t you care about the Earth, man?
Me: Get away from me mother(earth)fucker.
That’s a mix of what I actually said, and what I wanted to say.
The problem with these jerkoffs, well, one of the problems, is that there is no doubt in my mind if I actually gave them money in the morning just so they will leave me the hell alone, another one is going to approach me at lunch.
“Care about saving the planet?” Yes, but I’ll do it my own way. I’ll throw away my trash. I’ll recycle. I’ll go to Bonnaroo. But I’m not giving some guy on the street a dime.
It’s probably not a scam, but I don’t know where that money goes, and I don’t care. If I give anyone on the street money it’s going to be someone selling me a streetwise. Not some asshole who is trying to look dirty because he is “one with nature.”