Thursday, December 24, 2009



I’m stuck in quite a rut. Y2K had the dreaded Malaise. Recent times have this:

Monday: I wake up at 1:45 pm, after a long night of watching football (football starts at 3 a.m, here). I watch the 4th quarter of the Sunday night game while eating cereal (probably Honey Nut Cheerios), and check on my fantasy teams. Shower at 2:40, go to work at three. I teach my classes, eat take-out Korean food at work, leave at 10, and go to the gym until it closes at 11. I watch two episodes of Arrested Development on my iPod on the elliptical or the bike. I go home, watch the Jersey Shore, the Simpsons, and Family Guy, then surf the net. I watch more football highlights. I don’t drink. I read before going to sleep at 4-ish.

Tuesday: I wake up at 1-ish (Monday night is the best to catch up on sleep) and watch the fourth quarter of the Monday Night game, generally live at this point. I do this while eating cereal, of course, usually Honey Nut Cheerios. I shower at 2:40, and go to work at 3. I generally listen to Monday’s fantasy football podcast while prepping for class (ie, playing Sporcle.) I eat a snack, fruit or a small sandwich at work. I finish work at 10, and go out to Metropolis bar for beers, wings (it is wing night, after all) and darts. I generally get fairly drunk, but I only stay out until 2 or so.

Wednesday: I wake up at 12:30 and go to the gym. I listen to Tuesday’s fantasy football podcast on the way and while on weight machines. I watch two episodes of Arrested Development on my iPod while on the treadmill or elliptical. I leave the gym by 1:45 so that I can get to McDonald’s before 2 for the lunch special. There’s always a line. I take my McDonald’s to go, and eat it at home while watching Monday’s Daily Show. I shower at 2:40, and I put my clothes into the washing machine and start it. I have a lot of free time at work on Wednesdays. I do every conceivable piece of prep work that I need to do for the next week. This takes approximately 20 minutes. I chat with coworkers for awhile. I listen to Bill Simmons’ guess the NFL lines podcast, and I go home to hang my laundry (no dryers in Korea) and to make dinner. I eat at home while reading (as my computer will still be at work at this time). I return to work, read fantasy football articles, and make waiver moves. After killing lots of time at work, I leave at 10 p.m. I watch Monday’s Colbert Report and Tuesday’s Daily Show. I drink a couple of large glasses of soju and OJ while doing so, then I work on blogs until I get distracted or until I get too drunk to continue.

Thursday: I wake up at 12:45 and go to the gym. I listen to Wednesday’s fantasy football podcast on the way and while on weight machines. I watch two episodes of Arrested Development on my iPod while on the treadmill or elliptical. I return home at 2-ish and eat cereal (generally Honey Nut Cheerios) while watching Tuesday’s episode of Colbert. I shower at 2:40, and go to work at 3. I edit last night’s blog and remove all the racial slurs. Much work is involved. At my dinner break, I go to the nearly cheap pizza place and order either a pepperoni pizza or a cheesy crust hot chicken pizza. The latter is more delicious, but it costs $2 more. I take my pizza home, and eat 5 slices while reading. I take my clothes off the drying rack and put them away. After finishing work at 10, I go home, and I watch Wednesday’s episodes of the Daily Show and Colbert. I consider not drinking, but I almost always have leftover booze in my fridge from Wednesday, so I almost always drink it. I clean my apartment, the main activity of the evening, so that it looks presentable should a girl see it over the weekend. I take out my recycling at 3 a.m. Before this, I drink every drop of booze in the house that is “almost” finished, so that I can recycle said booze’s container. A trip to the basement to drop off my recycling generally leads to a trip to the store to buy more beer to drink on the street. I can’t take it home, because then I would have to take the empty bottle back to the basement. That’s a lot of hassle. I go to sleep later than I intended to, usually well after 5.

Friday: I wake up at 12:47, like old times. I watch the second half or so of the Thursday Night NFL game. I plan to go to the gym, but it never happens. Instead, I eat cereal, generally Honey Nut Cheerios. I shower at 2:40 and go to work at 3. I have 5 consecutive classes on Friday, and I end up getting annoyed. During my dinner break, I sneak off to the gym. I listen To Thursday’s episode of the fantasy football podcast while working on weights, and I watch two episodes of Arrested Development on my iPod while on the treadmill or elliptical. I go to New York Hotdog, and order either a chili dog or a red dog, spicy style either way. I eat the hotdog with my three remaining slices of pizza at home while reading, then shower again, cursing myself for showering the first time. Showering twice in a day is a lot of work. I return to work and teach one more class, and I awkwardly invite my coworkers to events that I know they won’t attend. I finish work at ten and go home, but only to drop my computer off. I go out to the Nowon bars and meet up with people. Sometimes I talk to girls. This rarely goes well. I go home after four, for the sake of eating McDonald’s breakfast.

Saturday: I wake up late, like 3 or 4 p.m. Any number of things can happen during the day on Saturday, but often Saturday is a day to watch Thursday Night NBC shows and lay around. I listen to Friday’s fantasy football podcast at some point. I sometimes go to the gym. At night, I usually go somewhere in town, like Itaewon or Gangnam, but I sometimes go to Nowon bars. Either way, the ending is the same - McDonald’s breakfast.

Sunday: I wake up earlier than Saturday, maybe 2 p.m. I head out into town, or to the suburbs, usually to someplace that I’ve never been. I burn through as many Adam Carolla podcasts as possible. I wind up at Subway, and order a footlong chicken-bacon-ranch (it’s cheaper than regular chicken for some reason) on wheat with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, onions, pickles, jalepanos, sweet onion sauce, and mustard - no ranch. I take it to go and bring it home. I eat it at around midnight while watching Thursday’s Daily Show and Colbert. I make additional fantasy football adjustments, then watch football at 3 a.m. until the game I am most interested in ends. I eat microwave popcorn. I don’t drink. The game that I am most interested never ends before 6:30. I get to sleep at 7 ish.



It seems that I am stuck in this rut, but forces for both good and ill are working to change it. Starting on Christmas Day, I have 7 of the following 10 days off. That should shake things up a bit. On the ill side, fantasy football is essentially over, as will be regular season football soon. I have to decide whether to pay $70 for an NFL playoff package, or if I should just watch the games a day late at the bar. On the mega-plus side, I just got my vacation time sorted out, and it will be February 26-March 7. Leaving the country will definitely shake things up. Also, then it will be March, basketball tourney time, spring retuning, and most importantly - Taco Bell coming to Korea. Life will be good.

Anyway, Merry Christmas.

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